


Mirror, Mirror, On the Wall

by Superfanatural



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, F/M, Light At the End Of the Tunnel, Magic Object, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Self-Loathing, dean helps, mirror, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-22
Updated: 2016-12-22
Packaged: 2018-09-11 06:10:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8960818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Superfanatural/pseuds/Superfanatural
Summary: A magic mirror who turns you suicidal when you look at it, is being kept in the bunker. Reader gets compelled by it, and ends up in a bad shape. Will Dean get to her in time? It's not a happy story, untill the end.*TRIGGER WARNING* Please this consists of detailed self-hatred, and self-loathing. And attempted self-harm, please don't read if this triggers you in anyway. You are all worth it, and please seek help.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, this one is a bit dark, I just had this idea in my head, and had to write it. I hope you enjoy it! ;)

You had lived with the Winchesters for two years now. Your parents had died from a Wendigo attack, the man who saved you Bobbie Singers, had brought you to two guys. You had gotten close with them, you saw them like brothers. Well Sam at least, Sam is the kindest person you know. He is very sweet and compassionate.

Dean however you liked from the second you had seen him, more than just family. He of course doesn’t know that. Dean had made you feel like no one ever had, loved, important and just overall happy. You took it hard, when your parents died. But Dean had helped you cope and had given you a home.

The last hunt you went on, involved around one of the cursed objects of John’s lock-up. You would think that they would have locked and secured it better. But no, another object went missing, so you guys had to get it.

Unfortunately, the damn thing was still in the bunker. A cursed mirror, that would creep into people’s mind and turn them suicidal with self-loathing thoughts. It was an awful thing to see and luckily you and the boys, were just in time to save somebody else.

The thing is that ever since it has been in the bunker, it has made you feel very uneasy. It feels like the mirror is haunting you.

It lay locked away in a room somewhere, but is still made you uncomfortable. You started to notice that you were looking fatter than usual, so you started cutting of some food. Not a to heavy diet or anything, just leaving the chips alone, and eating some salads with Sam.

A few days after the mirror hunt, the guys couldn’t really find anything new. Which you hadn’t had any problems with, you liked having a little bit more time to yourself. After you ate lunch, you went shopping. It about time to get some new clothes, so you kindly asked Dean to borrow the Impala. Reluctantly he said yes after you gave him a puppy face and compliments.

When you were in the store you picked out some jeans and t-shirts. You went into the dressing room and change into skinny jeans and a black t-shirt. When you stood in front of the mirror from the shop, you didn’t like what you saw it at all. Maybe it was the pants and shirt or the lighting, so you changed into a new pair.

You stood in front of the mirror and it was the same, your thighs looked bigger than usually and your belly was fat. Your ass looked huge and you stood there. Your eyes pricked and tears started forming in the corner of your eyes, you looked ugly. You hated your body. There were tons of stretchmarks on your thighs, arms, boobs and belly, way more than there had ever been.

Tears started pouring down from your eyes, you looked like someone who needs to be in a obesity tv-show, were they help you lose weight. You couldn’t stand to look at yourself anymore, you changed back in your own clothes and went home.

It was already pretty late, when you arrived at the bunker.

“Hey.” You heard Sam scream from inside, he probably heard you coming in. But you didn’t answer, you were to stressed to respond, and you didn’t want Sam to see you cry. So you walked straight to your room locked the doors, and cried some more.

You always had body issues, you never thought that you were pretty. That was one of the reasons that you thought, that you and Dean were never going to work. He was way out of your league, look at the girls he sleeps with, they are all pretty. At least way prettier than you ever was, now you were just embarrassed of your body.

As you sat on your bed, Sam came to check on you. Luckily for you, you had locked the door.

“Hey, Y/N you alright? Dinner is ready, want some?” He asked from the other side of the door. “No thanks I’m not hungry, big lunch.” You replied, trying to sound normal and not show him that you had been crying.

The rest of the night you stayed in your room, you didn’t want to come out, especially with Dean being there and all. He would probably think that you look disgusting, no wonder, even you thought so. You were determined on losing weight, even if that meant no eating.

Still you couldn’t shake the feeling of the mirror, that still stood in the other room. But it felt like it was calling out to you, in your mind. Telling you to get it out of the room, look at it. A few nights later, you couldn’t resist. So when the boys were sleeping, you sneaked out of your room.

You were on bare foot, the floor was cold, but you didn’t let that bother you. You tiptoed through the halls, until you finally got to the room. You opened it, the boys weren’t really careful, so they hadn’t locked it.

The mirror however was locked in a big box, more like a safe. It was made of steel, with al kind of symbols on it, to keep it in there. You knew it was dangerous to open it, but you were hypnotized. The box was almost as big as you, and locked. But you had borrowed, well that’s what you called it, from Sam.

You opened the steel box and as soon as you did. A bad feeling washed over you, but you ignored it. You were captivated by the power of the mirror. A old ragged white canvas was wrapped around it, so it covered the mirror completely.

Without hesitation, you took the mirror. Because of the size and weight, it was very hard to carry it all the way to your bedroom. But with a lot of effort, you got the thing there.

When you finally got it there, you felt odd. Maybe odd wasn’t the right word, but it felt like you sort of knew that it was wrong, but wanted to anyway. It definitely felt bad, the mirror made your loneliness even worse. And the hole inside you was now so big, you thought it would swallow you into oblivion.

But no sadly you were still there, consumed by all the bad feelings that went through your mind. You took the canvas off of the mirror, a beautiful gold mirror frame hugged the looking-glass perfectly. It was without a doubt old, but still in good shape.

You felt cold as you looked at yourself in the mirror, you have felt ice cold ever since that thing came in the bunker. Thousands of emotions went through you, and all bad once. Disgust, self-loathing and overall the feeling you were just good enough, not for Dean, not for yourself and not for your parents who you could save.

But you couldn’t cry, all these emotions but still nothing on the outside. You just stood there mindless, your face was pale and you had dark bags under your eyes. You looked starved, you hadn’t eaten in days. You felt numb, even with all these feeling you felt numb.

Controlled by the mirror, it spoke to you. To do it, take the it, cut it deep. Make yourself bleed, and just like it said you did it. You went to the bathroom and took a razor, it was sharp definitely good enough. You held it close to your wrists, before looking at yourself once more. You deserve this, and this was all you’re going to get.You were just about to cut as, you heard someone standing by the door.

“Y/N?” You heard a voice you knew all too well, disbelieve in it. “What are you doing?”He barely whispered, but he already knew the answer to it. 

You turned around, the blade still in the same spot on your wrist. Just like that the numbness went away, and all the emotions you felt came in a flood out. You dropped the razor and started crying.Tears streamed down your face like waterfalls, just before you could fall down to the floor, two strong arms caught you. Dean, the man who had seen it all, pulled you close to his body. Lifeless like you were a fragile doll, you let him help you.

He eased you down to the floor, were you than both sat. He didn’t say anything, he just let you cry. And you did for minutes, hours it seemed. His warm body and comforting scent, that smelled like leather, gunpowder and alcohol, calmed you down. After you had no more tears left to cry, you sat up. Your whole body shook, hands trembling. You didn’t dare to look him in the eyes, you felt so embarrassed.

“I-I….” You didn’t know what to say, you were at a loss for words. Maybe it was because you didn’t want to tell him. 

“Y/N it’s alright, you know you can trust me.”His perfect green eyes made you want to spill the truth, get it all out there. Because you really did thrust him, but were scared he wouldn’t like you, if you told him.

“I’m sorry. I know I can.” You just had to get it out of the way, you needed to tell someone. “I feel like I’m worthless, like I’m not enough. I feel like you and Sam don’t even want me, no wonder, I wouldn’t even want me. “ Tears started rolling again, but you didn’t let that stop you, neither did Dean.

“I know I only bother you and that you took me in just to be kind. I’m nothing, I feel like nothing. I’m also ugly, I’m not skinny enough, I have stretch marks, fat thighs. I can go on about everything that is wrong with me, because there is a lot. And...” You were stopped by Deans finger on your lip. You were surprised, but didn’t flinch. 

“Y/N calm down, it’s okay. It’s the mirror talking, it’s all in your head.” His low voice calming you down.

“Y/N, We love you. You’re the best that has ever happened to us and you make our life’s happier. You always make Sam and I laugh, and we wouldn’t ever want to get rid of you. You’re not a burden, but a blessing. Without you we wouldn’t be standing here, you’ve saved our life’s countless times, and we owe you big time. And Y/N, you are the hottest girl I have ever met. You’re perfect and absolutely gorgeous. You are not fat, you have a great body. You can at least enjoy eating, not like other girls who only eat green stuff, because the only thing they think about is weight. I don’t care about your stretch marks, I’ve got scares too. Your thighs aren’t too big, they’re perfect, you’re perfect and more than enough. Y/N I hate to see you like this, you shouldn’t be crying, you are way more beautiful when you smile.”

You couldn’t believe what you just heard. Dean Winchester, called you beautiful. And no you were not dreaming.

“Really?” Still not sure if you heard it right.

“Yes. I’m 100 percent sure.” Causing you to blush and smile. Which made him smile, he liked seeing you happier.

He kissed you softly on your lips, just a sweet short kiss. He knew he had to take it slow, step by step. The trance of the mirror would still be affecting you for a couple of days.   
You fell asleep in Deans arms, wrapped around you tightly. You knew you weren’t there yet, you could only wish for it to go all away. But you knew you’d get there, with Dean.  
 

 

  

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it, if you did please leave kudos or a comment to let me know what you think. 
> 
> Also for other Dean Winchester/ Reader fanfics, go to my account, I have loads more!;)


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